The Visual Meme on Bags

Ref yesterday's post about my travel woes on Thursday; why is it that some inconsiderate people think nothing of taking two cabin sized bags on a plane, and I'm not talking handbags? Women seem to be the worst offenders.

I've been doing a little experiment. Of late I have been including images with the majority of posts. The posts containing images get a far higher hit rate (from Facebook) than those without images. Such is the power of the visual meme and no wonder it's used so much in advertising.

Churchill's Europe & Project Boris

Bloody last leg of my journey from Hamburg to Bristol yesterday (Brussels to Bristol) was cancelled due there not being enough of us to make the flight profitable. 13 of us were shuttled to Heathrow and a coach to Bristol (I had to go to the airport to collect my car, the coach having passed my M4 turnoff 40 minutes prior to arriving at Bristol airport). Problem was a 7 seater minibus turned up initially, which was half the size required - more delay. What was meant to be a 14 hour day turned into a 22 hour one - didn't get home till 2am. At least I managed to stock up on Bols in Brussels airport - the main reason I went via Brussels (as well as it being £200 cheaper than a direct flight).

It was heaven breezing through passport control between Belgium and Germany (Schengen), but we were faced with the usual mile long immigration queue at LHR. The usual farce on the ePassport gates - 3 out of 10 working, and those 3 having issues too. It was like being at a Lidl checkout.

Continuing the Europe theme; it seems to me that those clamouring loudest on social media for the UK to exit the EU know least about it. Their main preoccupation is, understandably, immigration and its effect on jobs. They don't seem to realise that if we exit then tariffs will be imposed on our exports to Europe, resulting in uncompetitiveness against similar European products made and sold within Europe, with cutting costs (i.e. job losses) being virtually the only option to counter this. Immigration is a problem that can be resolved by staying within the EU, whereas tariffs are not addressable when outside and will be permanent.

The following Churchillian quote is currently being bandied about on Facebook; “We have our own dream and our own task. We are with Europe, but not of it. We are linked but not combined. We are interested and associated but not absorbed. If Britain must choose between Europe and the open sea, she must always choose the open sea.”.

Now this quote is actually a mishmash of two separate quotes. The last sentence was spoken four years after the previous four sentences.

Here is a snippet from an actual speech Churchill made about Europe; "The structure of the United States of Europe, if well and truly built, will be such as to make the material strength of a single state less important. Small nations will count as much as large ones and gain their honour by their contribution to the common cause." Here is the full speech. Churchill can be whatever you want him to be - if you cherrypick the quotesn - he was a politician after all and crossed the floor a number of times.

A survey has been performed indicating that the higher one's educational attainment, the more likely one is to vote remain; the less qualified are more likely to vote exit (and unfortunately that's borne out by observation on social media of the spelling, grammar and the bad language used by most of the exit lobby). Here's the link to the survey. It makes perfect sense when the exits are worried about nothing but immigration and its effect on unskilled jobs and they know nothing of the economic consequences - or simply aren't interested. Labour's policy of getting 50% into university would appear to work in favour of a remain vote.

Boris may well call the In vote Project Fear, but the Out vote is definitely Project Boris for PM and I'm certain a large number of his supporters in the Tory ranks are hoping for a position in his potential cabinet, should it go his way. I can  think of no other reason when only 5 cabinet members support out and the rest are total unknowns.

American Toilet Hun

I'm writing this at Bristol Airport waiting for a flight to Hamburg. The woman ahead of me at the check-in was complaining vociferously that there was no vegetarian meal option on the website check-in and holding up the entire procedure. Give me strength and deliver me from cranks.

Back to the issue of American transgender toilets. Some right wing Americans are complaining that such loos make it possible for perverts, dressed as women, to enter female loos claiming to be transgender when they're not, and attacking women and female children while claiming protection under the law. The fallacy within this argument is that it's an offence to attack anyone, regardless of whether you're dressed as a woman or not - there is no protection under the law, the argument just doesn't stack up.

I note it's mainly men who are doing the complaining and they seem to treat their woman as their personal possessions. It's frighteningly paleolithic.

An interesting survey showing men are more comfortable using a transgender loo and British women are less comfortable at the prospect than American or French women, yet there's not much difference in the percentage that at comfortable with it. Of course (and ironically) there is a percentage that is undecided......

Interesting factiod; I'm currently reading a biography of Atilla the Hun (for about the 5th time - must get  some more books) and we all know how during WWI the Germans were referred to as the Hun. Apparently the soldiers on the front were happy to use the term Fritz or Jerry and it was only the newspapers and those who remained at home who used the term Hun. Those in the field obviously saw the Germans as fellow soldiers just doing what they were told to do in appalling circumstances, whereas those at  home, who never came into contact with a German, were prepared to demonise and dehumanise them.

Strangely enough, all Germans were happy to use just Tommy when referring to British soldiers and saw no need to use dehumanising terms.

Stilton Power Doctors

What with being absent on the continent for most of last week, the cheese jar was left unattended. This resulted in the Stilton becoming somewhat liquid in parts, but it was heavenly and I couldn't get enough of it. You know, I'm convinced that my death certificate, when it's written, will list the cause of death as toxic shock and total organ failure from some hideous gastro-intestinal, bacteriological infection occasioned by a surfeit of over-ripe Stilton.

Scottish Power has been fined a record amount for bad service, yet we switched to them a year ago because they were the cheapest. There are only three ways a company can have the cheapest products:

1. They're a new entrant to a market that has been dominated by monopolistic entities who have kept the price artificially high,
2. They have developed an innovative manufacturing or product delivery process that cuts their costs, or
3. They skimp on customer service to facilitate price cuts.

Seems the strategy in power generation is number 3. It's a good short term strategy to generate immediate revenue, but not so good for the long term and retaining customers. Once you've pissed off a customer, you'll never get him or her back.

Jeremy Hunt was going on yesterday about it not being right that the BMA can stop an election promise to have 7 day a week hospital treatment - it's undemocratoc. Funny, it's usually the government that prevents election promises being delivered - as  I believe it to be the case here. The election manifesto does not say how a 7 day a week NHS is to be implemented, all it does say is that the government will ensure adequate staffing. Now, if we currently have a 5 day NHS and they are aiming for 7 days (although it actually works 7 days currently, but not officially), logic dictates they intend either;

1. to make doctors work longer hours at basic pay, or 
2. they are going to recruit more doctors. 

Given the manifesto specifically stated adequate staffing, the natural conclusion one can draw is that they would recruit more staff to cover a 7 day working week, and that's what the electorate assumed. Nowhere in the manifesto does it say they will tinker with junior doctors' terms and conditions to provide 7 day service with the current staffing levels and within the current budget. Hunt is playing a dangerous game with the electorate.

Regarding all the slebs who are advising us about whether we should stay in the EU or leave; before making up my mind I want to know David Beckham's take on the situation.

Strawberry Fields Forever

Got these the other day from a local greengrocer. 

Pine berries and strasberries, with the pine berries being reversed colour. Both are strawberry cultivars and not some 'Frankenfood'. The pine berries taste a little of pineapple while the strasberries look like a cross between a raspberry and a strawberry. The strasberries have a very intense strawberry flavour. Damned expensive, but I was intrigued.

A bit of a goading story in the Bristol Post last week. The council was being criticised for not celebrating St George's Day, despite having an area called St George's. I believe a council official said that Bristol was now too multicultural to celebrate St George's Day and couldn't afford to celebrate every culture's national day. I think this was a bit of a red herring. I certainly can't remember Bristol (or any other place I've ever lived in England) EVER celebrating St George's Day in any civic manner.

Births Marriages & Death

Working fathers get a 21% wage bonus over men with no children, a TUC study finds. The reasons aren't clear though, Perhaps they simply can't face going home, or have to work all the hours God sends just to feed them.

Saw an amusing post on Facebook last week. Someone had written; "My  daughter's boyfriend asked her to marry him. We're so happy......she refused".

Litter for St George

A quick comment for anyone with synaesthesia:

I'll bet you enjoyed that!

St George's Day yesterday. Ironic that our patron saint should be from Turkey (or some say Roman Palestine). This is probably lost on those who sport the cross of St George in an ultra-patriotic, extreme right wing, Little Englander manner and keep moaning about immigrants.

Talking of Little Englanders, I can't really believe Boris wants the UK out of the EU - he used to be such an ardent Europhile. He's just cynically capitalising on his belief that the majority want out (as perhaps was the case a while ago), and this is a perfect way of riding on the back of popular sentiment to become PM if the vote goes in favour of leaving. However, I think he's seriously misjudged the situation, especially as he can't seem to articulate a valid reason for leaving and keeps shouting; "Bollocks, Project Fear, Bollocks, St George!" and keeps attacking the pro Europe messengers, rather than the message. Boris has only one, sole political aim - to lead the Conservative party and be PM. He will sacrifice anything to achieve that aim, even his own integrity.

Christ! A vote for out is in effect a vote for Boris as PM.

Following our village litter pick a couple of weeks ago, passing motorists have once more turned the main road into a dump with discarded fag packets, cans, crisp packets and fast food detritus. I'm going to start a village vigilante group to lynch outlanders caught littering the place. There's a large cross in the church graveyard left over from Easter - that'll make a handy gibbet. May get a stinger too.

Was at Heathrow T2 on Tuesday and got a coffee from a place called Capuccino. Huge, plastic spoons the size of soup spoons and nowhere to recycle them - everything goes into the same bin. A bit criminal these days, ain't it?

Kim Kardashian or Prince - which has the greater talent? Close call, I  know. It was a bit unfortunate for Percy Sledge that he happened to kick the bucket on the same day as Prince, as the news of his death was somewhat overshadowed. 

Deprivation Index

What with us reaching peak celebrity deaths I would imagine William Hill and others will start a book on who is the next to go. It will become the new betting craze.

Ref the Knowsley Academy school that was in the news earlier in the week regarding its decision to no longer offer A levels. Knowsley is one of the most deprived areas in England and the government needs to give the local kids there whatever opportunity it can, not allow the profit motive to rule.

I compared it with where I live on a Liverpool Echo comparator.

A big difference - however we suffer more from crime (naturally, being more affluent and hence a target - along with all the Range Rover Defender thefts from farms) and have a worse record on environment, although it doesn't explain how this manifests.

Purple Toilet Humor

Prince has passed on (Percy Sledge too), yet the fabled Vault will ensure he keeps us entertained for decades to come. I don't believe he ever collaborated with Bowie, but he can now at the Great Gig in the Sky with the other Baby Boomers. Following this, never let it be said that Man Flu is not dangerous - it's a killer.

Been having a discussion with an old school friend who decamped to the USA many years ago and has become a staunch gun totin' Republican and all that implies to the neo-liberal, commie, red-under-the-bed English mind.  The subject was gender-neutral toilets and the furore that's causing in the more antediluvian circles of the American right wing.

American Republicans seem to be stuck in the 19th century when it comes to bodily functions, not realising it was the Victorians who invented segregated toilets (and crotched undergarments) in the first place, thus they are a relatively new concept. Even today no self-respecting Scotsman would blush at the prospect of displaying his meant and two veg to all and sundry in his kilt.

In Oslo there's no issue about a bloke sitting in a cubicle next to a woman while sending a log downriver, and here's the evidence from one of my customer's facilities. 

Given there is still a distinction of sorts, I asked why. I was told only one has tampon disposal facilities and nothing more sinister than that. Fair enough!

School Sheds and Hotel Rooms

A dilapidated shed in Abersoch has sold for £153,000. You can buy a new one on eBay for under £900!

The only school in Knowsley to offer A levels has closed down its 6th form offering - and it's an Academy. 155 A level students don't provide the Academy system with enough profit. Education should not be about profit. This is the dark side of the Academy system that Cameron is determined to foist on the UK. It's blatant privatisation of our education system and lets the youngsters of Knowsley down. Academy status makes no difference to a school's performance. Dressing a poorly performing school up with a fancy name changes nothing, as independent anaylses have shown.

The bed headboard in my hotel room in Oslo had what must be about the most useless gizmo I've ever seen - a little control panel to change the hue of the fluorescent light surrounding it:

It's a hotel room, not a bloody disco! And I swear the only reason I played with it was so I can post it here...

Was at the Edinburgh Airport Hilton last night and wasn't in the mood for jokes. Got served this, which was listed as a main course at £12 - Portobello mushrooms with added verbiage that made it sound appetizing and filling (you'd expect a main course to be a meal on its own).

It's obviously a starter portion worth about £6 max, and a zig-zag squirt of brown sauce can't change that. After I complained they thought discretion was the better part of valour and didn't charge me for it. Instead I was charged an exorbitant £6.99 for a glass of mediocre red wine. It's strange, but I've never had good experiences with hotel food in Scotland. I still shudder at the thought of the food at the airport hotel in Aberdeen some 4 years ago.

The Hilton here in Edinburgh had what must be the slowest internet on the planet and a breach of human rights legislation - 1.9Mbps download. No idea what the upload speed is as I got fed up waiting for Ookla to perform the download measurement.

When I got to my room I was confronted by a TV schedule comprising a load of bastards just doing their job - it's pitiful what passes for entertainment these days. The TVs are getting more difficult to control too - they're all Smart TVs that are too smart for their own good. It's OK having one at home where you have the time to learn its operation and are confronted with the same TV day in and day out, but to have a different model every day when travelling is a bit taxing on your patience.

Played "find the bedside light switch" for several minutes (have you noticed how the hotels compete to utilise the most esoteric bedside lights that you just can't figure out how to switch on?). Waited five minutes for the bloody eco-bulb to ramp up sufficient lumens to actually read by.

Sometimes I love travelling, at other times it can be the most excruciating experience on earth.