Wednesday, 29 April 2015

The Election Juicer

What with that story about some of us having backs like chimps (hence the back pain when trying to walk upright), are we going to see chimps clogging the doctors' surgeries. I'm sure UKIP will have something to say about that!

A humorous look at the election doing the rounds on Facebook (but no Labour):

The general consensus is Delemza being Labour; full of good intentions but always screwing it up.

However, it could be Miliband = Ross; Sturgeon = Demelza.

Hayley has gone all eating disorder on me, wanting to go on a two day juice diet to combat a bit of bloatiness and "detox" herself, despite her knowing full well that there is no such thing as a detox and the body does it naturally all the time - that's what it's designed for. A juice detox is a load of middle-class tosh, if you ask me.

Anyway, I got out all the utensils for the Kenwood - there are hundreds of them - and lo and behold, there was a juicer attachment. At the weekend she doubled our normal weekly fruit and veg budget in preparation, hauling a massive amount of produce from Ian, the greengrocer on the High Street (much cheaper than even Lidl).

On Monday she tried the Kenwood, but the stuff went everywhere - up the walls, over her, on the floor. That persuaded her to buy a dedicated juicer on Amazon. It arrived yesterday when she was out, and being a typical bloke confronted with a machine I had to try it out. To cut a long story short, I juiced 2 carrots. The juice was delicious, but the residue pulp looked rather tempting too, so I scooped that out of the machine and ate it. The pulp was still rather juicy and had I strained it through a bit of muslin it would have yielded at least another quarter cup of juice.

Then came the dismantling and washing up - took almost half an hour! I'd have been better just eating two carrots. Total waste of money, time and effort! Just eat some normal fruit and veg.

When Hay came home so made a concoction comprised of 2 apples, 2 cucumbers, parsley, mint and spinach. Tasted vaguely minty, but overwhelmingly foul. She had it for dinner, whereas No.1 Son and I had the traditional morning after detox afforded by a tasty Indonesian curry.


  1. We also had a juicer, made great juice and like yourself the time consuming work of cleaning the damn thing, eventually out weighed it's attraction.
    So we gave it away....

  2. Trouble with juicers is you end up wasting the good fibre. There are grunty 'blenders' on the market now that'll 'juice' the lot. Their drink sized containers have a sealable cap. Drink it or store it - no extra cleaning. You could even add your curry...