Mr President

Is it my imagination, or are the Republicans viewing the nominations as a challenge to get someone even more stupid than Bush into the White House?

Overheard Monopoly on Bad Taste While Growing a Tamponade

Overheard while watching "How to Grow a Planet"

Presenter: ".... our earliest ancestors, the monkeys."

No.1 Son: "Dad, do you believe in evolution?"

Chairman: "Certainly."

No. 1 Son: "Does that mean you're closer to being a monkey than me?"


Chairman: "Hmmmph..."



Overheard while watching Holby (a UK clinical drama).

Doctor Actor: "It's a cardiac tamponade!"

Chairman: "What's that?"

Hay: "It's a,,,..."

Chairman: "Condiment made from olives and ox heart?"


Ever noticed that when Arab potentates are seen schmoozing foreign diplomats, the furniture on which they sit and surrounds them appears to have been designed by someone with execrable taste? All glitzy and covered in white and gold brocade, with wood that can only be direct from a rather hideous repro furniture catalogue or the set of The Only Way is Essex.

Overheard While Flying in China

Overheard while listening to a news item about the efficacy of intercessory prayer.

Hay: "From a scientific perspective, I have no problem in accepting that people of faith are healthier, in general, and live longer than people who have no faith."

Chairman: "Unless, of course, they were martyrs. Martyrs tended to have a relatively short life. 


Take the time to have a look at these incredible videos of some guys flying.

 
Chinese Scenes from BASE-Book - Matt Gerdes on Vimeo.

Long-Lining from BASE-Book - Matt Gerdes on Vimeo.

Overheard Hotspot for Plan B

Overheard in the restaurant:

Chairman: "You do know that I do it for you, don't you?"


Hay: "What?

Chairman: "Keep myself looking unattractive; it stops other women getting interested in me."

Hay: "I think I'd rather take the risk!" 


The blog briefly became an internet hotspot On Saturday - I had some two and a half thousand hits. Investigation of the pages causing such a flurry of activity showed it was one with an image of the American actor, Ben Gazzara, who died on Friday. That image is apparently in the top line of a Google  image search of the chap.

The builder started putting the oak cladding on one the the gable ends of the house on Thursday, but then hit a problem that he hadn't anticipated. This resulted in a day and a half's work going down the pan, him apologising profusely and refusing to take any payment for him of his other two chaps, despite Hay and I assuring him that the build was a leaning curve for us all and we had no problem with paying him. If only more tradesmen were like that.

Plan B goes into action today.

Talking of planning - I find it illogical that you're not allowed to change a Grade II listed building in any manner, even to bring the accommodation up to a decent standard; yet planning regulations forbid you to build a house with the kind of period features that Grade II listing stops you changing.  

It's precisely a lack of planning regulations throughout the majority of England's existence that has created  the wonderful architecture we have, and now planning regulations have left us with a myriad of hideously inadequate chicken coops.

Time for a Change - Corporately Speaking

It seems to me that shareholders these days are more interested in the profits from buying and selling shares than the dividends. This can lead to market manipulation, short-termism and excessive risk-taking by the boards of companies.

Perhaps it's about time that something was done about this and punitively taxing share profits such that the focus goes once more on real profits, rather than ephemeral ones gained from share prices. It would certainly lead to less short-termism and more realistic corporate valuations.

Anyone got a counter-argument?

The Periodic Table Table

Yes, you read right and I didn't mistakenly write table twice - and here it is:

It was made by a guy in the US, and you can read about it here. He has a really crappy website, but I love the concept. Strong within him the Force must be.

Would adore one for the new housebuild, especially as Hay is a biochemist, but she thinks it a bit faddy.

What's in a Word (of God) for Italians

Some 120 Church of England clergy have written a letter to someone (it's not clear who, but probably someone in a frock and a pointy fascinator [and why does Blogger's spell-checker not recognise this word?]) saying civil partnerships should be facilitated in churches.

A few weeks ago, John Sentamu, the Archbishop of York, said that marriage is defined as a contract between a man and a woman and it is not for the state to 'dictate' the meaning of the word marriage.

Logically, and by implication, the Archbish must mean that the CoE should also not dictate the meaning of the word marriage - the church has no monopoly on the dictionary, nor the rite itself. 

Commonly used words (unless scientific or professional) are not generally defined by institutions, but by popular use. Take the word 'gay', for example, or 'awful', the meanings of which have changed over time - the latter now meaning the total opposite of the original usage.

If the church defines marriage as being only between 'a' man and 'a' woman, does that mean Archbish Sentamu does not recognise polygamous Islamic marriages?

Perhaps the Archbish should invent his own word for his bigoted version of the marriage contract. Methinks he's a bit of a Cnut, who, as many will know, tried to turn back the waves under the inexorable onslaught of the tide....

Now, apropos of my little trip to Italy earlier in the week, I now present my homage to famous Italians:

Fabrizio

Biaggi

Rossi

Schettino

Overheard - Free, At A Cost

Overheard in a conversation:

Her 1: "My sister works with autistic adults."

Her 2: "You mean men?"


Was in Rome earlier this week on a business trip. Stayed at a Sheraton and was rather unimpressed by the total lack of tea or coffee making equipment in the room.

To be fair, there was a sign saying that free tea or coffee could be delivered to the room - for the small cost of a 7 Euro delivery charge. I'd want a burger, some fries and a side salad for that!

Bastards!

Consistency of a Giraffe

Fred "the Shred" Goodwin, the man who sank RBS, loses his knighthood, despite not having been found guilty of a crime in the courts. 

Certain lords sitting in the upper house acted criminally (and still won't pay back illegally gained expenses), yet are still lords and no-one is clamouring for them to lose their titles.

Something not quite right here, surely? One rule for those who anger politicians and another for politicians. Populism of the worst kind, if you ask me.

Why is Sainsbury's making bread out of giraffes?

Overheard at Sainsbury's Doing Homework

The Chairman, No. 1 Son, Hay and her dad are at the local Sainsbury supermarket:

Hay's Dad (aka Caravan): "I'm looking for one of those things that takes the air our of a part-drunk bottle of wine to stop it going off."

No. 1 Son: "Dad prefers something that takes the wine out of a part-drunk bottle of wine to stop it going off - he calls it a mouth."

No.1 son is reading out his history homework:

No. 1 Son: "And the Japanese view was ..... I can't read this - good grief, my writing is so neat now that I can't even read it anymore!"