Sunday 24 December 2017

Merry Christmas


Ain't it strange that our Christmas cards have not yet gone post-Brexit. We still have cards that show perfect, German, Christmas idylls - complete with a tree that Prince Albert introduced Also the snow, which is very northern European and not at all British. It must infuriate Brexiteers.


Anyone ever seen a sleigh in England?

Post-Brexit we'll have to develop our own national Christmas, complete with blue (or rather black) Christmas cards to match our passports. Santa will have to dress in festive oilskins and cards will show rain-soaked English streets glistening in a harsh sodium lamp glow. 

Champagne? No - Newcastle Brown!

Santa Clause has a foreign ring to it - we'll have to revert to calling him St Nicholas - but he was Turkish, so he'll have to go. St Farage, perhaps with a Yule log? No - Farage is a French name. St Boris? Just can't get away from these damned foreign names.

German Christmas markets will be banned too, along with glühwein and other foreign imports. Hanging an MP or a judge as a traitor at Christmas will doubtless become a national post-Brexit tradition. 

I was looking forward to a Brexit argument over Christmas, but there aren't any Brexiteers round here - I'd have to go down the pub for even a remote chance of finding one.

Fröhliche Weihnachten everyone...


1 comment:

Roger said...

I think we will have to knock Christmas on the head post brexit, We won't be able to afford it.
Happy Christmas yo you and yours sir!