Animal Trainers

Overheard in the house:

Chairman: "You know, I do believe we have a house that cleans itself - I never seem to have to do anything to clean it, it just happens."

Hay: "Mmmmmmmmm."

Well, that's an end to photos of snow on Facebook, thank God.

I was reading an article in the paper yesterday about a proposal to reintroduce Cameron's plan to bring ex service personnel into teaching by offering £40k bursaries. Cameron's plan was a deemed a failure due to the low uptake, but offering bursaries of £40k might just do the trick.

When I think back to my schooldays, almost every teacher had served in WWII and lack of classroom discipline was almost unheard of - arguments and fights were relegated to the playground and certainly not the classroom. Cheek was something that was met with a crack around the ears, of an early morning heave-out. Maintaining discipline among a pack of wind animals is not easy if you don't have the training.

Perhaps wild animal trainers should be encouraged to become teachers too...

Talking of children, Germany has a declining birth rate, as does the UK and most of Europe. Our social provision is based on there being more people in work than retired - vastly more. The options are either to admit immigrants or reform pensions and all manner of social provisions.

There is one solution that's never mentioned - praise the people some normally refered to as 'feckless'; the ones who pop out kids every year. They're doing their bit for Britain and perhaps we should pay them to continue. The issue is the kids they pop out need to be educated and not left to rot. Of course, that would be anathema to Ukip and the Conservatives.