I was on my way back from Gloucester after dropping off some injectors when I received instructions from the boss to bring back food for the team. I pulled into the KFC at Michaelwood Services on the M5 - first time I’d set foot in one for about 30 years. Back then you could just walk up and order exactly what you fancied: six pieces of chicken, a pile of chips, job done.
Not anymore. Now you’re herded into the brave new world of touchscreens and pre-packaged “meal deals”. Want chicken and chips without a bucket of fizzy sugar-water? Tough luck. The screen won’t let you. The system insists you take the drink, whether you want it or not. It’s a modern absurdity: they’ve turned simple fried chicken into a rigid algorithm. Imagine if a fish and chip shop tried the same trick - “Sorry mate, you can’t have cod and chips unless you take a Coke with it.” They’d be out of business inside a week.
So I walked out, shaking my head at the nonsense. No chance I’ll ever set foot in a KFC again. Instead I drove on to Lidl, where £13 bought me everything I actually wanted - plus a huge punnet of black grapes and four figs - something infinitely healthier than anything Colonel Sanders ever fried up. strangely enough, no-one touched the figs, except me.
What was supposed to be a straightforward Gloucester errand ended up proving a point: when “convenience” becomes this inconvenient, it’s not worth the bother. Simpler, cheaper, healthier - and without a touchscreen telling me what to eat.
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