Friday 7 May 2010

British Politics Takes a Nasty Turn As Parties Use 9/11 Tactics


UKIP MEP and former UKIP leader, Nigel Farage, says he is "lucky to be alive" after a kamikaze stunt went badly wrong when he didn’t manage to kill himself and the Conservative candidate for Brackley in a ball of flame from an exploding light aircraft.


It is thought that the UKIP election banner he was wearing around his head in preparation for the kamikaze dive came off and became entangled in the plane’s tailfin before he had managed to set the autopilot to target the local Conservative Party HQ.

Nigel Farage before take-off.

Intelligence reports from the Daily Mail suggest Farage had recently been on a day trip to the Bora-Bora Mountains of Afghanistan where he was trained in 9/11 tactics by an al Qaeda faction aligned to Sheikh Philip bin Mountbatten.

I was travelling back from a customer meeting in Southampton yesterday and went through a Hampshire village where it looked as if the Lib-Dem and Conservative candidates had been engaged in an escalating war of election posters. I first spotted a small Lib-Dem roadside poster, followed 100 yards on by a larger Conservative poster, followed 100 yards on by an even larger Lib-Dem poster, followed etc, etc, etc for about a mile.

It’s a bit much, don’t you think, when the UK’s population has to rely on Eastern Europeans to decide on their new leader. I wasn’t aware of this myself until I head the news reader saying the electorate was going to the Poles to elect a new leader.

Never in the field of human voting has the fate of so few been decided by so many ill-informed.


3 comments:

Alan Burnett said...

I have not seen the analysis done yet, but it would be interesting to see the impact of UKIP votes in marginals the Conservatives might have taken. There is a good chance that they alone are responsible for us not having a majority Conservative Government this morning. I am almost tempted to say "Bless 'em" but I can't get the words out.

Chairman Bill said...

Bert: I'm keen to see the Cons get a kick in the marginals.

Jennysmith said...

Good one Bill! Well, the Poles couldn't do any worse tho' could they? Tho' they probably need to turn to us as their own president recently bought it witn any untimely end.


xxx