Thursday 23 February 2023

Overheard Imaginary Conversation

The other day I saw a lady with a large, Akita-type dog and thought to myself that this was unusual, as most women like small dogs, if that's not misogynist of me. I then imagined a conversation between Mr and Mrs Caveman at the time the wolf was domesticated and became man's best friend.

Mr Caveman: "Hey sweetie, I have something to show you that I've been working on for a few years. It's an experiment I performed in that cave over in the next valley, as I wanted to keep it secret.

"I took a couple of wolves and bred them, selecting the most docile from the litter and then breeding them too. This went on for a number of generations and this is what I got - I call it a dog.

"I've bred out most of the aggression, but retained enough for it to protect me, as it has accepted me as the leader of its pack. It's useful for hunting and isn't afraid of fire, so it can sit around the hearth and protect us."

Mrs Caveman: "That's all very nice dear, but could you breed another one that's 1/6th of the size, has fluffy curls and a pink bow in it's hair?"


I wonder whether the dog a man walks is the result of household power dynamics. A large dog, like an Alsatian, and the man is the main decision maker; a small lapdog, like a French bulldog, and his wife is the main decision maker.

Yes, there are compromises, such as the Labrador retriever, which is big, but decidedly docile and a bit daft.


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