Friday 21 September 2018

Gurning Gregg & Lotus JPS


Last night we watched a few minutes of Masterchef by accident. It's not something we have watched for years - Hay calls it Mastershout. You can see why Gregg Wallace is television gold; when he's questioning contestants about what they have prepared there are alternating shots of the contestant talking and Gregg making facial contortions that remind me of a gurning contest. On looking up 'Gregg Wallace facial expressions' on Google. I discovered he's noted for it.


I had occasion yesterday to sit in a Mini Mayfair and it was like sitting in a chair at a London gentleman's club. Loved the retro leather look.


It was somewhat akin to sitting in an old Wolesley Hornet. I had a Wolesley Hornet in the 70s Originally it was white, but I had it resprayed black and gold and put gold pinstriping on it, thus giving it a Lotus JPS livery to add a bit of pizzazz - God knows why. I ended up totalling it on Gladstone Dock in Liverpool on the last day of a radar course. The sump hit a grid and I bent nearly every panel on the car.

My mum had bought me the car as she was worried about the deathtraps I was driving, which were held together by sheets of metal from empty tins and body filler. She phoned me at college to say she'd bought me a 'mini, but not a mini' - she wasn't very conversant with car marques - and I spent the next few days in a very excited state thinking she'd bought me a Mini Marcos, or at the very least a Mini Jem. No, she's bought me the most pedestrian version of a standard mini, albeit with a walnut dash and plush, leather seats - 2nd hand, of course. I wasted no time in trying to improve its looks to give it a bit more street-cred, hence the Lotus JPS colours.


The difference couldn't have been more stark, although a few Lotus JPS minis were actually produced.



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