Saturday, 6 November 2010

Abu Hamza's Allotment

Overheard in the caravan:

Chairman: “Shall I make some baked apples?”

Hay: “I like crème fraiche with my baked apples.”

Chairman: “We don’t have any - I’ll make some crème Anglaise.”

Hay: “Do you know how to make crème Anglaise?”

Chairman: “Well, we have some eggs, that should be a good start.”

Hay: “Great – baked apples with scrambled eggs.”

Despite it pouring with rain here last night, it still sounded like the Somme with all the fireworks going off for Guy Fawkes Night.

Abu Hamza, the jailed Muslim fanatic, has been allowed to retain his British passport due to the fact that his Egyptian citizenship was allegedly revoked. Without a British passport he would be rendered stateless, which apparently is anathema in human rights legislation.

It would seem that the solution would be to given him an alternative citizenship and then revoke his British passport. I would suggest he is made a citizen of Rockall – and just Rockall, but without the fishing or oil rights – and then deport him.

Hamza once said that the Space Shuttle Columbia disaster was a sign from God of his displeasure with the Americans. Seems he interprets anything bad that happens in the west as a sign from God. I wonder then how he interprets the United States’ winning the war against Iraq and Afghanistan? Surely, if Hamza’s logic is to be believed, it can only be a sign that God is displeased with the Iraqis and Afghans for their wicked ways?

I’ve heard it said that Abu Hamza has a nasty left hook, as well as a nasty right hook. Mind you, it’s better than a poke in the eye.

Hay and her sister think Abu Hamza’s Allotment is a good, if somewhat surreal name for a rock group.


  1. why are you so happy.. Your supposed to be depressed !

  2. Well I think it is a disgrace. His own people reject him and we have to put up with him and his costs. We should send him back to his native land passport or no passport. I know we are seen as moderates and humanitarians but we should draw the line somewhere. How many other scumbags should we house because they fear for their lives elsewhere. And what thanks will they give us?

  3. He's a big fan of "tradition", we should avail him of a British one, like landing on Pitcairn Island and burning the boat.