Triumph & Useless Things for Useless People

Have to say I was quite impressed with the opening ceremony, although I would imagine a lot of it was lost on those poor dears not lucky enough to be British. Anything as complex as that was bound to have parts of it going over heads (some of it was lost on me too), but well done Danny Boyle! I didn't watch the whole thing and switched off when some athletes with flags invaded the pitch. Not sure what they were doing there - perhaps it was the interlude entertainment. Mrs Queen and Bond was a masterstroke, although I'm certain it wasn't the real Bond...

Had a gander at the dross available at Schiphol airport yesterday on the way home (glad I came back via Bristol and not LHR).

For starters there's the Funnel Friend - you and I might know this as the jug, but not the people marketing this very expensive and cutting-edge labour-saving device. 

Next, for your delectation, I present the bowl with a built-in spoon-rest. The fact it's hard to get the spoon off and then on again is by-the-by, as is the fact you don't really need a spoon-rest on a bowl - the bowl itself serves that function quite adequately on its own - or the table. It also makes stacking the bowl a tad difficult. Utterly pointless!

Then we have the expensive bit of hi-tech, Formula 1 machinery that doubles as a garlic crusher. What's wrong with the flat side of a knife, for God's sake, or even the palm of your hand (a la Jamie)?

I think I'll move into designing stuff for people with more money than sense - like an arm rest for an iPhone or a wallet opener.

The people in Holland seemed blissfully unaware there was a world-shattering event about to be held across the North Sea - it was wonderful, no wall-to-wall Olympics! The continent is very obviously isolated.

I hear that Assad is claiming his Tweet about bombing Aleppo was a joke.