I'm conspiring toward a theory

The conspiracy theory circular I was sent on Friday included readers’ comments from a website – you know, the usual compilation of semi-literate, misinformed drivel interspersed with the odd gem from some wag with a good sense of humour and perspective. I was absolutely astounded at some of the comments; it’s incredible that after millions of years of evolution some people still retain a level of intelligence lower than that of an amoeba. I swear some of them don’t have opposable thumbs (there’s a scary thought – a virus with opposable thumbs – I think I’ll start a conspiracy theory using that meme).

Here’s a sample (they are direct copy & paste, so don’t blame me for the spelling or grammar):

no way will I be getting this vaccine- and niether will any of my family-- this is a sick con. if you want to protect yourself research mms, colloidal silver, iodine, vit c - there are many cheap ways to keep healthy - but because they are cheap they are not profitable to big corporations

MMS – or Miracle Mineral Supplement - is a quack remedy with no scientific basis whatsoever and as efficacious as Peckham Spring water - it’s basically a disinfectant or bleach but is touted by unscrupulous charlatans as a cure for AIDS, hepatitis, cancer and TB. You may just as well tout Domestos as a cancer cure. If anything is a sick con, then MMS certainly is and anyone who believes in its efficacy is a fool. I defy anyone to produce reputable clinical trial evidence of it working. Colloidal silver will turn you a dramatic shade of grey and make you resemble a black & white photo. Iodine, however, is essential to the body and plays a part in the immune system, but as long as you eat the odd bit of fish you get enough (table salt in the west is loaded with the stuff). Excess vitamin C is excreted out of the body as it can’t be stored; you get enough in a healthy, balanced diet and so taking vitamin C supplements is a complete waste of time.

I too was amazed to find just how many of my fellow Brits are aware and awake to what is going on with regards this vaccine. I thought surely as a nation we are too clever to fall for this, and all of you are showing that that is exactly the case. Now it's times like this I am proud to be British!

I’m not, if you’re a representative sample of the species.

Brits Don't let this happen! Your brothers and sisters across the pond Do Not want this here in America. If you let this happen you will set an international precedence that can be rhetorically used to justify the act in the States.

WTF? It doesn’t even make sense!

I've had swine flu. It was nothing but a sniffle. Would rather have that than a vaccine made by psychopathic eugenicists.

Let’s get the pitchforks and rush torches out and burn the scientists shall we?

The World Health Organisation CREATED the swine flu virus - provable! They are planning mass genocide of most of the population of the world. ALL VACCINES ARE POISON DO NOT TAKE ANY!!!! I tried to warn of vaccine danger A BBC blog but the BBC CENSORD MY COMMENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Perfect opportunity to MICRO CHIP everyone if you ask me. Its happening in the USA.

A statement is not proof. Just a tad paranoid, would you not say – possibly even barking. Not surprised her comment was censored. A study has shown that women generally use more exclamation marks than men and her excessive use of said punctuation is surpassed only by Adolph Hitler when he was on steroids.

Research the history of polio vacc, small pox, and Thalidamide. The evidence is that vaccinations do not prevent disease.

Plain wrong and total misinformation. Thalidomide was not a vaccine; smallpox has been eradicated and polio vaccine has reduced incidences of polio by 98% since vaccination programmes started. Clearly a diode short of a full circuit.

The conspiracy theories around vaccination are loopy. Gov.t is too inept to manage such a scam.

At last - a sensible comment with which I totally agree.

Wow! I'm overwhelmed and reasurred by the responses to this article.. I guess we're not all as daft as they think hey? They'll be no jab for me or mine either. It's all about depopulation and folk are beginning to realise this.

Here’s what I think; all the governments of the world, along with a cabal of international bankers – not forgetting the Zionists of course, can’t leave them out - have decided there are too many thick people in the world and that they are reproducing at an exponential rate. They have therefore purposely manufactured a conspiracy theory that scientists are engaged in a programme of depopulation through enforced vaccination with contaminated vaccine. The purpose of this is to scare thick people into not taking any vaccine at all with the result that they will die from a rather virulent acne pandemic and the general IQ of the population will thus increase as a consequence. Any who do not die due to a natural immunity will be immediately identified by being grey from swigging colloidal silver. The grey people will be dealt with separately in monochrome lunatic asylums or used as slaves.

The vast majority of the British public are naive to all of this,but what is clear to see is that we are waking up at an exponential rate. I've done my research and know this for a fact, the majority vacinnes do not work.

Research? Where? The tabloid press? The MacDonald’s University? Mad Magazine?

I am reminded of a trio of Bertrand Russell quotes:

• Never believe a stupid man's report of what a clever man says, because he unconsciously translates what he hears into something he can understand.
• Man is a credulous animal, and must believe something; in the absence of good grounds for belief, he will be satisfied with bad ones.
• The public will believe anything, so long as it is not founded on truth.
  

There's another conspiracy theory doing the rounds - one that says God can cure illness and doctor's can't. The sad thing is that believeing in this conspiracy theory can lead to death, and did in the case of an 11 year-old girl in the USA whose father prayed for her rather than letting doctors treat her treatable diabetes. Needless to say, she died and he's now facing prison.

Set the caravan fire detector off yesterday while singeing my ear hair with the piezoelectric cooker lighter.