Monday, 4 January 2016

Chairman's Literary Booze Recommendations

Antiques Roadshow - I'm just waiting for someone, when asked how the item in question came into their possession, to say they stole it.

Was doing some window shopping at Waitrose yesterday and spotted these booze gems, which I highly recommend:

This one eliminates the need to handle two bottles at once - the vodka and the cola bottle. Obviously this is meant to be consumed while driving, when using both hands can be a tad dangerous.

This one seems targeted at children - nothing like starting them early on something that reminds them of school dinners. Just a shame Heston left out the custard flavour.

The final one is for the lady of the house - an early-morning gin to be taken between the hours of 7am and 9am, before the school run.

Watched Beowulf on TV last night - it's a kind of 5th century Coronation Street plot about Grenville, who I believe has a corner shop up north, selling local things for local people. He's rather terrifying, as anyone who knows northern corner shop proprietors knows.

The plot concerns Rothko (bit if a painter) having died and appointed his wife as Thing, as his son was a bit immature. I suspect also because he was a bit frightened of his missus, what with her being a northern woman and all that.

They'd adopted a migrant called Beowulf, a Sean Bean voice clone who wasn't too fond of Grenville and wanted to take over his corner shop. Beowulf is meant to be a migrant, but is actually a brother from another mother to Rothko's legit son, but that's a secret. Grenville looks rather like a cross between an orc and Gollum. Coincidence? I think not!

Some of the action seems to take place in Wales, and some outside the gates of Mordor. More advert time than programme time, if you ask me.

The TV rendition of War and Peace. Read it in my youth (as one of those books you feel you should read before you die and about which you can at least have an opinion when discussed in polite society - a bit like Shakespeare). Terminally turgid and impossible to keep track of the various princes, princesses and counts. Imperial Russia had more aristos than a dog has fleas. Couldn't face more than 10 minutes of the dramatisation. Anna Karenina with battles; The Archers with aristocrats; Eastenders with serfs.

1 comment:

  1. I like to think that on A.R. when someone say they 'acquired it', that was the posh form of stole.
    Thank God I won't have to watch Beowulf or War & Peace now. Lesley