Saturday 29 June 2013

Castle Doom


We went out to dinner last night in Yatton Keynell and called in at The Castle Inn in Castle Combe on the way back, just to remind us of the menu.

Strange place - Castle Combe that is, not the Castle Inn. I am convinced the entire place is a weekend retreat for people from London and there are no indigenous inhabitants at all. We walked past the gorgeous little cottages on the main street in the glimmering dusk and not a single light was on in any of the houses - in fact most had drawn curtains, as if totally empty and deserted.

Spotted a couple in a car who pulled up at one cottage and hurriedly unloaded some bags. They had obviously just arrived from London.

With the exception of the two pubs, the place is deserted and during the day you see only tourists. It has been pickled in aspic as a quaint museum piece where the most radical thing you can do is paint your front door in a colour that's not Farrow & Ball.

Took this snap of a print of Castle Combe from donkey's years ago - there are more people in the print than you'll see in an entire week in the village itself.


It's totally dead and sterile, occasionally inhabited by London people and their strange ways.

While in the Castle Inn I had a read of one of those expensive foodie magazines that try to make out that the local artisan businesses are all truly local, when you know full well that they're run by posh immigrants  from London who don't bat an eyelid at paying exorbitant prices for organic Quark and buy stuff from the Highgrove shop in Tetbury (Tetters tat).

Anyway, I spotted an advert for a competition where you could win £200 worth of cycling accessories. £200 of cycling accessories! I wouldn't spend £200 on a bike, let alone accessories! How the hell can a plastic cape and bicycle clips cost £200? Oh, I forgot - the readers are all from London and spend more on a bike than I'd spend on a 2nd hand car.


3 comments:

J Cosmo Newbery said...

Fluoro lycra cycle jocks with inbuilt polyurethane cod-piece will probably mop up the 200 quid with little or no change. But what would I know? I walk.

Phil Nicholas said...

whats more the Villagers are now trying to get the well known race track closed for the noise it creates There must be locals phil, there were over 1000 people on the complaint list submitted...

Chairman Bill said...

London weekenders!