Thursday, 9 April 2015

BMI Recycling

Chairman: "There's been a meta-analysis of data that shows people who have a BMI of 30 and are slightly overweight live longer. Seems the received wisdom, like the maximum units of alcohol, is nothing more than a guess."

Hay: "As a bloke who drinks too much and is slightly overweight, I guess that's like manna from heaven to you. Who sponsored it - MacDonald's and Famous Grouse?"


Chairman: "Does the black plastic go in the plastic recycling?"

Hay: "How many times have I told you? No it doesn't!. Your memory is atrocious."

Chairman: "I told you yesterday that my memory is perfect, I think."

Even Later:

Hay: "My colleagues at work can't believe I have a partner who cooks."

Chairman: "You don't know what problems you've unleashed now. There's now a whole swathe of women who will be entirely dissatisfied with their partners, holding me up as a paragon of virtue  - and their husbands or partners will be blaming me."

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