Monday, 16 June 2014

Camo, Two Pieces of Fish and a Toilet Roll

There was a picture in yesterday's Sunday Times of a 20 or more Ukrainian separatists, most of which were dressed in camouflage. It struck me that field camouflage is not the ideal clothing to wear when fighting what are essentially street battles in cities and towns. Surely T-shirt, jeans and a hoodie (or in the case of Eastern Europe, the ubiquitous black leather jacket) would make you melt into the background and indistiguishable from the rest of the population? Wearing camo is going to make you look as conspicuous as as Sepp Blatter at an anti-corruption convention.

Seems to me that those dressed in 'camo' are in the game more for egotistical than ideological reasons. Repressed bullies, perhaps, wielding boys' toys.

Overheard at the BBQ at Hay's sister's place:

Hay: "Badger - go over to the house and bring back the cool bag. Inside the fridge you'll find a bottle of Cava and in the freezer is a cool bucket and some ice packs - bring them too."

About half an hour later - after The Chairman had been distracted by something in the house:

Chairman: "Got the cool bag, the frozen salmon and the loo roll - where shall I put them?"

The Chairman was put in charge of The Play List, using his mobile and a Bluetooth connection to the Bose Bluetooth speaker. Everything was proceeding fine until Hay decided she wanted a particular track played; a track The Chairman didn't have in the The Play List.

Predictably, what ensued was total chaos as Perry was brought into the equation and people were hanging out of the upstairs window shouting: "Badger - do you have a cable that connects a doo-free-doo to a thingummy?" The Chairman did not.

Have one person in charge of the music and calm is the order of the day. Allow a request, and you end up with the kind of order as prevails in a Taiwanese brothel. At one stage we had 3 different tunes playing from 3 different devices from 3 different windows.

The Play List must be left to one person, and preferably one who can lay claim to a few drops of Teutonic blood in their veins. Leave it to a bunch of anarchic, Normanised Anglo-Saxons and chaos reigns. I mainly blame the Norman influence.

1 comment:

  1. Loo roll? Now how did that slip into the equation? But for some reason I find this understandable.