Tuesday, 15 June 2010

I Run on Beans - Laser Beans

Doctors have warned that laser pointers can damage your eyes. That’s a bit like saying stabbing yourself in the guts could be a bit dangerous or that chopping one leg off could give you a limp. Anyone but a complete moron knows what a laser is, and it doesn’t take a PhD in theoretical physics to put two and two together and realise that if James Bond nearly got cut in half by one, then pointing in into your mince pies ain’t exactly therapeutic.

Talking of chopping your leg off - or laser guidance; on Friday I was taking my usual lunchtime walk, part of which which involves a trek across a large playing field. I was reading and replying to an e-mail on my CrackBerry and when I looked up I had veered 90 degrees to the right of my intended track. Apparently it’s quite common for people to veer off in one direction of t’other if there are no landmarks to guide them. In a flat, featureless plain you could end up going round in circles for days.

I wonder if it’s coriolis effect, or just one leg being a nanometre shorter than the other.

Can anyone answer where the title of this post came from?


  1. Perhaps it's the Stella-Artois effect?

  2. You've obviously got a Frank Zappa & Captain Beefheart fixation there somewhere ...