Wednesday, 2 June 2010

Supernatural Conspiracy Theories


From being a staunch atheist, last night Hay managed to convert me to a firm believer in all manner of supernatural entities.

The proofs she cited were the washing fairy, the ironing sprite and the cooking elf.

I had to admit that when I come home and throw my clothes into the washing basket, they miraculously reappear a few days later freshly washed and ironed. There can be no other explanation than supernatural intervention and a bending, or even outright suspension, of the laws of physics.

The same has to be said for the miraculous appearance of cooked food every evening. Jesus Christ could only manage bread and fish, whereas whatever entity is responsible for the appearance of food in our household manages to work miracles with salads, potatoes, legumes and all manner of meats.

Hallelujah!


From New Scientist:

“HEARD the latest? The swine flu pandemic was a hoax: scientists, governments and the World Health Organization cooked it up in a vast conspiracy so that vaccine companies could make money.

Never mind that the flu fulfilled every scientific condition for a pandemic, that thousands died, or that declaring a pandemic didn't provide huge scope for profiteering. A group of obscure European politicians
concocted this conspiracy theory, and it is now doing the rounds even in educated circles.”

The UK politicians listed are:

  • Mike Hancock – Portsmouth South,
  • Paul Flynn – Newport West, and
  • Christine McCafferty - Calder Valley (who lost her seat at the last election).

2 comments:

  1. Hallelujah Brother. I will fall down to me knees in praise if you send that ironing fairy up here. As for your other piece : Christine MmCafferty, shame on you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have a gremlin instead. He makes the TV remote disappear... and socks mysteriously vanish in the washing machine.
    And crumbs trail from room to room... alongside Magnum wrappers.
    Sx

    ReplyDelete