Unkind Halal Cuts

Yesterday the government announced a package of cuts worth £2bn. This is rumoured to include the axing of the NHS, pensions, social security payments and the civil service.

I was listening to smug American politicians who drive massive hunks of metal that do 20 mile to the tonne having a go at BP’s chief executive yesterday and accusing him of cutting corners with safety. I’d have loved him to ask the politicians the following question; if it were possible to stop the flow of oil, but only by cutting corners and completely disregarding safety legislation, would you sanction such action? They sounded like a bunch of sanctimonious arseholes pandering to their public and wanting to appear of prime time TV. It was positively medieval in tone and a bit X-Factorish.

A Coventry farmer has been making halal bacon for Muslims which is made from turkey, rather than pork. Some Muslim scholars are up in arms about it as they think it’s the thin end of the wedge and will lead to actual bacon eating. One said: “"It can ultimately lead to people who only eat halal food ending up eating the real bacon - bacon from pork." Whatever next? One taste of pork and they could feasibly become apostate! Pork should be banned as a dangerous substance having mind-altering properties.