Friday, 22 May 2009

Friday 22/05/09

20th April 1653; Oliver Cromwell:

“It is high time for me to put an end to your sitting in this place, which you have dishonored by your contempt of all virtue, and defiled by your practice of every vice; ye are a factious crew, and enemies to all good government; ye are a pack of mercenary wretches, and would like Esau sell your country for a mess of pottage, and like Judas betray your God for a few pieces of money.”

“Is there a single virtue now remaining amongst you? Is there one vice you do not possess? Ye have no more religion than my horse; gold is your God; which of you have not barter'd your conscience for bribes? Is there a man amongst you that has the least care for the good of the Commonwealth?”

“Ye sordid prostitutes have you not defil'd this sacred place, and turn'd the Lord's temple into a den of thieves, by your immoral principles and wicked practices? Ye are grown intolerably odious to the whole nation; you were deputed here by the people to get grievances redress'd, are yourselves gone! So! Take away that shining bauble there, and lock up the doors. In the name of God, go!”

Rather apposite given the current row over expenses. I hear Conservative MP Nadine Dorries is suggesting mass suicide if more revelations are made public. Not a bad idea.

World’s oldest blogger dies. Had a great idea – flash blogging. We all descend on one person’s blog at an appointed date and time, and bombard them with comments.

I became a great-uncle yesterday. Why are women so preoccupied - no, obsessed - with telling all and sundry the weights of babies? Given 99% of babies fall within a range of weights that are considered normal, does the fact a baby is 6lb 7oz have any greater significance than it being 7lb 3oz? It’s not as if when you die they announce: “Henry Wiggins died today, weighing 9st 11oz.” No, when you die it’s your age that becomes the differentiator.

On the subject of great-uncles; why is it that my brother becomes a grand-father and I become a great-uncle? Surely I should become a grand-uncle - or at least an Arch-Duke.

I was looking for a tajine on t’internet for Hay last night. Ever heard of a tajine you can’t cook with? Well here is a selection, and you can’t cook in a single one of them. Idiotic!

The Oldorough Retreat winner is due to be announced. I’m expecting the call anytime now.

Was reading a report on the low incidence of cancer in people with Downs’ syndrome. Since they have an extra copy of chromosome 21, it’s been proposed that they may be getting an extra dose of one or more cancer-protective genes and there’s a whole study being done to prove it. I mentioned this to Hay, who happens to have an extremely incisive intellect, as well as a PhD in bio-chemistry. She responded with the simple observation of: “Well, they would have fewer cancers – they die much earlier and cancers are generally a disease of the older person.” Seems the researchers have missed out on the obvious by taking a reductionist view.

Was listening to a surgeon on the Case Notes Radio 4 programme on the way home the other night. He said that specialisation in surgery is becoming so bad that surgeons are no longer able to treat patients holistically. They concentrate on fixing the problem in which they specialise, unwittingly neglecting conditions which may be causing the very problem they are treating. He also stated that it will not be long before surgeons revert to practices of the past – i.e. becoming barber surgeons and fixing nothing more complex than broken bones – as chemistry is becoming so effective that most ailments and conditions will be treated by pharmacists and technologists, requiring very little in the way of opening up the patient.

He said that before much longer it will not be necessary, for example, to do hip replacements. Liquid will merely be injected into the afflicted hip that will provide a new surface for joints. Cutting out cancers will also become a thing of the past when targeted chemicals will be administered.

It’s been suggested – and I can’t find the reference – that if everyone in the UK were to eat their 5-a-day portions of fruit and veg, then there wouldn’t be enough fruit and veg on the shelves (or in the UK) to satisfy demand. Also, if everyone were to eat only the recommended amounts of meat, the knock-on effects to the beef industry would wipe it out.

Of late I’ve been struggling to get a decent hit from vaping the e-cigar. I suspect I’ve cut the e-liquid so much with BP glycerin that any nicotine is now down to homeopathic levels – a memory of nicotine.

Here’s more from the Famous Filton Shops archive:

Now this shop is called MystiQ, but I’m not sure exactly what it sells; however, the store owner knows that. In fact, I’m surprised she (why are clairvoyants invariably female) didn’t come outside to welcome me into the shop. I particularly like the sign on the right for her mediumship classes - ‘book early to avoid disappointment’. I would have added that those who have been on the course no longer need to book early for anything – inceed you can book at the last minute, secure in the knowledge that your spirit guide will ensure you’ll be buying at the best possible last-minute price. The value of that when using eBay would be phenomenal.

On holiday next week, so blogging may be sporadic. Will probably use Twitter to maintain contact with the blogosphere – well, that or clairvoyance.


  1. Henry the Dog's mum22 May 2009 at 07:24

    I simply had to post a comment in response to yours on mine - ha ha ha ha no I'm not married to him. The irony of your comment - you will never know;)!!!????

    By the way, I still read your blog - I prefer it to the online newspapers. Very interesting today by the way....

    Take care

    Henry the Dog's Mum

  2. HtD'sM: Please - one exclamation mark or question mark will suffice. More than one is a sign of poor breeding.

  3. I love it.
    When my sister used to raise her little finger while drinking her tea, my mother always used to say 'the higher the finger, the lower the class'!!!
    MSN have now got a map of Britain that you can click on to see which MP's claimed what in all the different constituencies. Hilarious.
    The reason most clairvoyants' are women, is because, like Hay, they know things that other people don't.
    As for you going on holiday - Enjoy, and let Hay keep the parking ticket please.

  4. Belle: What's the meaning of all these aberrant apostrophes?


    Your's sincerely - Mr Pedantic.

  5. Dear Arch Duke Bill Pedantic,

    Do you think anyone could get away with calling an MP a "sordid prostitute" today? I'd certainly like to try!

    The surgery thing is a symptom of the failing health system (ambiguity alert : health system that is failing, not system for failing health), same thing happens here in France.

    I'm going to sign up for the mediumship class. However, I hereby give notice that, once the class completed and for obvious reasons, I will no longer follow your blog or any others.

  6. Kapgak: I knew you'd say that.

    Belle: Apology ackcepted.

  7. Clairvoyance works for me... Be seeing you....

  8. Jinksy: Mind that car tomorrow at 3pm!

  9. Henry the Dog's Mum22 May 2009 at 11:36

    !!!!!!!!!!???????? B***ocks!!!!!!:)

  10. Congratulations Bill. I myself am a great-aunt. No, the weight of babies mean nothing to me but I found myself telling everyone this when mine came into the world. So God knows...


  11. I think HtD'sM meant Burdocks but you knew I was going to say that, didn't you ?

    P.S. I get video ads now - currently for scientology but always with a religious turn. Stupid buggers don't know just how much they are wasting their tim.

  12. This is my first visit to your Blog. It reminds me of a radio talk show! Are you Jimmy Young, perhaps?

  13. Jenny: C'est la vie.

    Kapgaf: Naturally - day before yesterday.

    Dave: No - I'm far older than Jimmy Young.

  14. Once again, I wish to complain, Sir, that I am too unintelligent to leave a comment on your blog...